.::My life::. |
Sunday, July 29, 2007
In The… In the darkness of self doubt, I accuse. In the darkness of obsession, I accuse. In the darkness of insecurity, I accuse. Lost in the darkness consuming my soul, I accuse. Lost in the Light you emanate, I awaken. Lost in the Light that is you, I awaken. Lost in the Light of Love, I awaken! ©2007 Broomhilda
Sunday, May 01, 2005
Pandemonium of emotions Whirl in the maelstrom, The heart torn, Deprived of love it withers. In consummate loneliness, The contempt of abject Despair breeds a darkness of soul. Tears fall, cleansing in their purity, Gentle absolution at their core. Mourning the loss of innocence, The bastions being erected, In bravado hiding, The tender heart.
Sunday, April 10, 2005
(this was inspired by Sray and his posts on the Hubble telescope and Nasa Solar Sail)
Monday, March 28, 2005
Wisdom whispers in our ears, We ignore it. Belittling what we don't understand, Hating those who are different. Striking out at imagined threats, In ignorance and fear. Wisdom whispers in our ears, Still we ignore the message. Educating ourselves, The only way. Bring tolerance and love into our lives, Celebrate our differences. See the ways we are the same, We are more alike than not.
I've moved beyond the maiden form From whence I was immortal Soon leaving the mother form behind Where still I had forever In transition myself I find A life to be examined Reconciling with the past Confronting the darkness within Glimpses of just who I am And who I wish to be Grandmother Sage I call to you Your wisdom I do seek Help me see what I push away Find the lessons learned Move past the fear and anger and pain Accepting myself for me
Friday, March 25, 2005
Sleep evades, the mind whirls Loneliness rears it's ugly head Insecurities rise to the surface Playing games with emotions Stresses from the week replay Is a friendship lost? Feeling cemented into place Yearning to move forward Breaking free chains of the past One link at a time
Saturday, March 12, 2005
In dreams tender embrace You were there A whispered kiss of passion You were there Soft caresses in the dark You were there Waves of pleasure enveloping You were there Intimacy and ecstasy erupt You were there Whispered kisses and caresses You were there Sleeping in dreams tender embrace I awake alone
Friday, February 25, 2005
Frozen in fear A vast wasteland of emptiness I feel so alone Filled with self doubt The flame extinguished Will I ever feel warmth again?
Thursday, February 24, 2005
The sun feels good upon my face, I am transported to some other space. Places I go to, within my own mind, Stands still the waterfalls of time.
Voices, they called my name again, can't remember just when it began. Conversation was spoken so low, I thought at first, it was winds that blow. It started when I was alone, voices had invaded my home. I try to listen with care, voices of people, who aren't even there. I often wonder if they see, what their voices are doing to me. Voices on the wind, where it began, wind wasn't blowing, I heard them again. I have to wonder, is this just a game? Could it be, I'm just going insane. whispering my name again, voices that came on the wind.
Streams that rush on winter's day, bring me thought's of hearth and home. And though I wander where I may, to that stream my heart doth roam.
Love lasts forever, at least on my side, but you'll never see it, it's emotions I hide. I'm afraid to feel, to love again, I know that in love, I'll be hurt in the end. It all starts the same, time after time, Quietly it ends, like the song of a mime. My emotions are crying, hidden deep down inside, while inside I'm dying, my two worlds collide.
There is always hope, when people care, first the tortured soul must be bared. Mind, body and soul begin to heal, when the love from peoples heart's is real. It's not easy, the past to let go, the human mind plays it's own picture show. Ghosts appear from out of the past, hope helps you to know that they won't last. What do they do, these people I see? They do what they can to help me find me.
Children in the park, they play listen to sounds that seem to say, come let's sing and laugh and run, come with us and have some fun.
Wednesday, February 23, 2005
Not quite yet, a woman, yet not a little girl. I know you are embarrassed, by hormones in a whirl. Nothing to be ashamed about, it's as natural as can be. It's just your time for growing up, acceptance is the key. We are here to guide you, your sisters one and all. So Welcome to the Sisterhood, we won't let you fall.
Where shadows cloak the bastions of love, The wise one weaves her glowing sphere, awaiting the archer.
Dancing in the circle at sunset, the sky in crimson hue. The song it comes upon me, glistening like the dew. I cannot hear the music, nor can I hear the words. I feel it in the depths of my soul, the song of other worlds. Worlds of flight and fancy free, those worlds of imagination, Worlds belonging to the trees, and worlds of constellations. Worlds that live within our minds, our hearts, our souls, our being. And worlds of crossing over where my ancestors are singing.
Night descends, the Dark Mother comes, A gust of wind, I hear Her hounds, Goddess of Crossroads, Queen of Witches Come to me with your whelping bitches, Dark Goddess, sender of nocturnal visions, Sending dreams to assist with decisions, Goddess of Death and Renewal, Lifter of the Veil, Guiding Souls along the Summerland Trail, Triple Goddess, Most Lovely One, We've gathered tonight, the Sabbat's begun, I honor You, and those departed, Let me speak with loved ones, from whom I am parted, Grant me Wisdom, Your favor and Protection, Let me bask in Your Holy Perfection.
Memories stolen, awareness remains, Gone, my childhood, soon my name. My heart is bleeding as you slip away, Into the darkness your thoughts fade. So much of you has already gone, Yet your body, lingers on. I miss the talks we used to have, The walks along the beach. Tears of anger and frustration, Of love and longing for your return. This thief that has stolen you from me, I have lost the best of you.
The moon is full, The night is warm, To the rhythm of life I dance with abandon. She fills my heart With Her silvery light, And warms my soul with love. I've come this night to honor Her, In all Her many forms. It is She, Who calls me forth, Revealing magicks, yet unknown
I am the air you breath, the breeze that kisses your face. I am the fire that warms your heart, the ember that burns in your soul. I am the water that gives you life, the rain that quenches your thirst. I am the earth that gives of it's bounty, the land ever changing. I am the spirit of love and light, a part of the All.
Silently, creeping into my room at night, heard him coming, lay frozen in fright. Soon his touch would make me sad, it should never come, from one who is dad. Innocence stolen in darkness of night, too young to know, I could fight. Time went by, a soul was twisted, too young to know, could have resisted. Growing older, started running away, learned it was wrong, just couldn't stay. For thirteen years abuse I took, childhood stolen, worse than a crook. Memories locked deep in my mind, flooded out, it was a matter of time. I understand, life's been a mess, my lifestyle, has caused such distress. A hate inside I'm learning to feel, through therapy, I'm starting to heal. I know what is right and is wrong, scars on my soul, still sing their song. sadness sings of what was taken from me, and wondering, why, no one would see. No child should live what I've had to face, what is taken from us, can not be replaced.
Storms at night are a wonder to see, just shut off the lights and at one you'll be, with thunder and lightning across the sky, just look at them with a child's eye. Open your ears and hear the way, the wondrous music of thunder plays, as lightning dances across the sky, you'll see anew and wonder why, your old eyes hadn't seen, the violent beauty, that storms do bring.
Emotions flooding through the wall I've created. I built it strong, It's not even gated. The shadows of shame, anger and hurt, making me feel like a slug in the dirt. The memories are there, some have leaked out. I want to run, to scream, to shout. There are cracks in the wall I thought so strong. Shadows of guilt, telling me I am wrong. It's coming apart, this weakened wall. I know that soon, the damn thing will fall. When it falls, will I still exist?
Trees in pristine glow White flakes covering darkness The world seeming cleansed Serenity of the woodlands calls I make my way cross frozen streams To the safety of the Fey.
Women wise and wonderful Queens, us everyone Objects shared in sacred space Reminder of our hearts A mottled image of good luck From a friend so dear A book of memories and dreams A mother's gift to us Pictures of children smiling bring The promise of immortality Memories of a full life lived With tears of love created Four legged key to a heart Opening what was closed How precious these memories are How beautiful our souls
Accusations consistently spoken Suffocated by your insecurity I allowed you too much power Incessant passive aggression The ruination of my self esteem I allowed you too much power Constant attention demands Exhausting my body and mind I allowed you too much power You are chaos Causing me to lose myself I allowed you too much power From my coma awakened Erecting bastions of reality I take back my power No longer fear choked black and hollow My resolve strengthened I take back my power Beautiful and alive Sensual and vibrant I take back my power Compassionate and intelligent Sensitive and strong I take back myself!
Storms of life, never easy to see, in these storms, I lost my true me. We play in life, cards we are dealt, but on a soul, some cards leave a welt. Time and space have no meaning or rhyme, when losing a hopeful part of your mind. I've entered a haven, yet truth I can't see, come here in search of one who is me. I cannot live as once before, running from pain, welling up ever more. Body worn out, mind and soul as well, Can no longer live in my personal hell. Anger, resentment and hurt built up, doors to happiness, being locked shut. Voices that come late into the night, as panic attacks in attempted flight. Frozen in fear, for eons it lasts, need to confront the ghosts of the past.
I sit here in silence, In meditative contemplation. What has brought me to this place, This stage of life's lessons learned? Was it love's fulfilling warmth, Or friends held so dear? Was it the good times had, Or partying til dawn? No! It was the crap!
I remember back to the age of five his sneaking into my room at night love me touching, caressing, placing hands on me stealing the innocence from my soul help me I grew older, it didn't stop outrageous behavior no one would see leave me twisting of mind, body and soul shadows of anger, shame and hate killing me running away, from one to another drugs, alcohol, sex, out of control rescue me feeling like nothing, like slime, like a whore why did you do this? you were supposed to protect me
In the quiet time I walk, Stillness envelopes me like a blanket. Moon glow softly caresses my skin, Star shine encircles my head like a crown. Sacred circle of Oaks beckon me forth, I dance among them like a child come home.
Twin spires crumbled to the ground, clouds of disbelief billow Cowards, under the guise of martyrdom, killing in the name of love Shock turns to fear, fear into anger, more innocence will suffer Heroes look like ordinary people, dying in the name of love Families ripped apart, lives torn asunder, hatred flooding the world Nothing "Holy" about a war, fought in the name of love Revenge and fear breed contempt, some have agendas to be met Angels crying at these acts, done in the name of love.
Ah the feel of his breath on my neck, The scent of him. The beating of his heart next to mine. His skin soft and warm, His arms strong and gentle. In loves tender embrace I sleep.
Farewell sweet soul, Your flame burned too briefly And you were luminous! Farewell sweet soul, Our hearts lifted by your smile Our lives brightened by your presence. Farewell sweet soul, You've left the bonds of this mortal shell And gone home to peace. Farewell sweet soul, Know that you carry our love with you And you forever reside in our hearts! Farewell sweet soul, Know that you are loved and missed!
I remember our songs, what your hugs felt like. I remember your love, tucking me in at night. I remember your smell, smile and laughter too. But mostly, I remember you. I remember that day, the panic I felt. I remember the pain, on my heart there's a welt. I remember the day you were put into the ground. I remember I screamed, but out came no sound. I remember I felt abandoned, alone. I remember thinking; I can never come home. I remember you loved me, unconditionally too. But mostly, I remember you.
In the darkness of the void, A single point of light. In emptiness alone, Filled with love. The One In longing split, Two halves of a whole. Their dance a vortex created, Conception in consummated love The Two In pain and joy birth waters erupt, Swirling energies beget life Suns, Moons, Earth and Sky, Galaxies born this night The Many In ecstasy of creation they dance, Their children populate Stories and songs will praise as we become, The All.
Goblins dance upon the lawn Chanting and fighting by bonfires light, Werewolves howl until morn Beasties and ghosties invade the night, The time for witches is coming soon to sing and chant and celebrate, They gather 'neath the harvest moon between the worlds they guard the gate
Riding wind, dancing breeze Summer's end, turning leaves Amber hues, Golden grass Autumn muse, beauty surpass Flickering flame, bonfire roar Energy raised, spirits soar Broomsticks swept, darkness meet Cauldron bubbles, circles complete
Sunflowers bowing, As monks on their way to prayer Tomatoes hanging on the vine, Like monkeys in a tree Bean stalks reaching to the sky, Looking for the giant Raspberries blush in mornings light, Like a girl's first kiss Peppers gliding along the ground, As if swimming in the dirt Little cabbages in a row, Dancing in a chorus line Little parcel of land, Lush with life Wandering and dreaming In Auntie Coletta's garden.
An overgrown pathway in a wooded glen, I follow it. Through brambles and thorns a clearing appears, I enter it. A weather worn stone standing in the wind, I go to it. A plot overgrown with weeds and decay, I sit near it. Why a sentinel in this forgotten place, I ask of it. The sun beating down I close my eyes, I dream of it. Of life and love of death and rebirth, I learn of it. All are connected through the light of life, I finally get it. I found this path I was meant to take, I'll walk upon it. I will learn the lessons it has to teach, I'll treasure it. When I come to the end and journey home, I will remember it.
Within these castle walls I see A gathering of souls Lost in memories of lives they led And ancient battles fought. Unable to escape the past They roam the castle yard The glory of their youth it seems Is what is being sought. Witches gather in the court The circle has been cast Aid to those who've lost their way Consumes their every thought. Ancestors honored on this night Guide them to their rest Beyond the shadowy veil they go Where loneliness is naught.
Dragons stalk behind the ivy veil Emerging from the crimson well, Unicorns prance upon an ocean of grass, The fey dance, specters in the wood, Trees swaying silver leaves, Undines play, surfing waves of blue, Visions come unbidden, as I lay sleeping.
My lips part slightly And with whisper softness A feather brushes them Exquisite torture My body Tense with anticipation I tremble you press your lips to mine Tidal waves of pleasure carry me away All from a simple kiss
Withered like a flower in winter, that part of me being splintered. Beauty in life I no longer find, buried in shattered parts of my mind. Now life, has grown cold, in what is left of my soul. Where laughter and love should have been, lives a pain I cannot mend. Trust of a child was destroyed, dreams of a girl, null and void. From abuse, comes only pain, stamped on a heart, again and again. A spirit to be encouraged to grow, beaten apart till it fell too low. Body and mind totally trashed, leaving trust completely smashed. Hopes shattered 'til they were waste, leaving a soul, with pieces misplaced. Anger, resentment, pain and fear, twisted a life that once was so dear.
|
Home Disclaimer The Clothesline Project - Help break the silence of domestic violence
Some people live life in the fast lane. I live in oncomming traffic. This is my Poetry blog. It's mostly crap, but one or two showcase my brilliance. Be sure to check my home blog and sign my guest book. Feel free to leave a comment.
.
Previous Posts
Archives![]() ![]() |